The One You've Been Waiting For, R&R Fans Anyway
by bbforever
Summary: Takes place after The One in Massapequa.  The story of Ross & Rachel's engagement, wedding, and the birth of their child.
1. The One With the Planetarium

Disclaimer: I wrote this a long time ago in a script format only to find it was "disqualified." So now I've rewritten it to a more typical story style. I have to say that screenplays are by far my better expertise, but hopefully this is still somewhat enjoyable. Oh, and I don't own anything, except some of the ideas and probably the jokes. Takes place after The One in Massapequa.

* * *

Monica had outdone herself once again. Chandler was sitting in their apartment enjoying breakfast when Ross rushed in telling them that he was going to ask Rachel to marry him. While Monica was shocked beyond belief; Chandler took the opportunity to crack a joke. "Most guys date before they propose, but not Ross, he goes straight for marriage number four!"

Ross was not amused and Monica could see that her brother really was serious. Sensing his best friend needed some encouragement, Chandler supported his decision, but the moment he did, Ross began to have his doubts. "So you think I should really do this?" Ross asked.

"Yes!" Monica and Chandler exclaimed together.

With that, Ross went on his way to make the biggest decision in his life (again).

* * *

Ross rehearsed what how he was going to propose to Rachel in his head over and over again. He created scenarios in his head where Rachel was overjoyed and others where she crushed his hopes like a bug. No matter how it went with Rachel, Ross knew he had to do one thing first, and it pained him to have to do it. He found himself standing in front of a large house rapping the brass knocker of the wooden door. He hoped that there would be no answer so he could say that he went through with the plan without lack of trying. Ross was disappointed however when Dr. Leonard Green opened the door.

Dr. Green seemed surprised to see Ross initially, but his shock was soon disguised with clear disdain and boredom. "Oh it's you, the uh…dinosaur guy," Dr. Green said casually.

"Paleontologist," Ross corrected.

Telling Ross there weren't any dinosaurs on the premises; Dr. Green tried to close the door on him. However, before Dr. Green could shut the door completely, Ross stopped it with his hand and said, "Actually, I'm here about Rachel."

"What did you do to her now?!" Dr. Green exclaimed.

"Well, I haven't done anything yet; it's what I want to do to her," Ross answered. Dr. Green was clearly disturbed by Ross' response. Trying to explain, Ross corrected himself. "I…I just want to marry her." Dr. Green began to calm down, but he clearly was not convinced of Ross' good intentions yet. "You know? Marriage. Like you wanted? The…the baby will have a father?" Ross continued. Then he thought to himself, "Oh dear God, let this work."

"And you came here to ask for my permission?" Dr. Green asked skeptically.

Sighing with relief, Ross confirmed Dr. Green's analysis. Reluctantly Dr. Green gave Ross his permission to marry his daughter, but made it clear that he his acceptance of their marriage didn't mean he was ever going to like Ross. Thinking that their conversation was over, Dr. Green began to close the door.

"Oh, and one more thing," Ross interrupted.

"I'm already giving you my daughter and now you want more?!" Dr. Green asked outraged. Ross explained how Rachel always talked about her grandmother's ring, and asked if there was any way he could obtain the object. "First you get my little baby pregnant, then you want to marry her, and now you want her grandmother's ring?" Dr. Green asked as if it were the most preposterous suggestion a person could make.

"Umm…yes?" Ross said afraid of Dr. Green's next reaction.

To a beat, Dr. Green plainly said, "Well, I don't have it. Jill wanted it and I already gave it to her. Now if you don't mind, I'm going back to my '74 Latour," and with that, he closed the door in Ross' face.

* * *

Ross approached the door to another house. He dreaded going to this one more than he dreaded going to see Dr. Green. He took a deep breath and knocked on the door, only to have an unexpected Mrs. Green answer it. "Ross, what are you doing here?" Mrs. Green asked. After greeting Rachel's mother, Ross asked if Jill was around. "Well, yes, but what do you want Jill for?" Mrs. Green was nothing if not a gossip and was clearly interested in what this man who once had an interest in one daughter would want to see her other daughter for.

"I kinda have a favor to ask her," Ross answered making sure not to give away more than what was needed.

"Well, ok," Mrs. Green said somewhat reluctantly before yelling for you daughter to come down the stairs. "Ross is at the front door for you!" Mrs. Green explained before leaving.

Jill rushed to the front door excitedly, but stopped in her tracks when she saw Ross at the door. "Oh, Rachel's Ross. I thought Mom meant the cute Ross from the country club." Seeing her mistake, she began to close the door, clearly uninterested in anything Ross had to say.

"Wait!" Ross cried grabbing the door before it could shut completely. "What is with this family and closing the door on me?" Ross added to himself. Snapping back to what was important, Ross told Jill that there was something that he needed from her.

"Oh?" Jill asked, clearly interested in the impending proposition. Ross explained once again how Rachel had always talked about their grandmother's ring, and how he would like to use it for his proposal to Rachel. Slightly offended, Jill clarified, "So first you dump me, and now you want my ring?"

"Umm…well…yeah…I guess." Ross said fumbling. This clearly was not going the way he had originally anticipated.

After giving it some thought, Jill gave her decision. "Well…I suppose I could part with the ring…" Jill said finally. Ross was clearly shocked and overjoyed with Jill's response. She really had grown up. "…For a price," Jill added. In that very second, all of Ross' elated happiness came crumbling down.

"What do you want?" Ross asked, knowing in the back of his head it was going to be something outrageously unreasonable.

Jill thought some more. "I don't know. It's gotta be big though. I mean, this ring…it's an heirloom. It's not cheap," Jill said laying on the guilt trip as thick as she could. Hoping to get out of this fairly unscathed, Ross offered Jill a thousand dollars. "Hmm…no. This ring is far to special to be compensated with money," Jill said innocently.

"Then what? What do you want?" Ross asked wanting the torture to end.

"I want…" Jill thought a moment, and then Ross could see the flash of evil in her eyes when she finally drew a conclusion. "I want you to name the baby after me."

"What?! No way! I can't do that!" Ross cried outraged. What was Jill thinking? He would never be able to convince Rachel to name the baby after her spoiled little sister.

"Well then no ring. It looks far better on me than it ever would on Rachel anyway." Undisturbed by Ross' decision, Jill began to close the door once again.

Sensing that he was losing his opportunity, Ross stopped Jill yet another time. "What! Wait! Ok, we'll name the baby after you," Ross said somewhat defeated.

"You promise?" Jill asked playfully.

"I promise," Ross said coldly.

"Cross your heart and hope to die?" Jill added.

"Jill!" Ross yelled, tired of the games she was playing. However, clearly unhappy with his response, Jill decided to once again try closing the door on Ross. Panicking, Ross added, "Cross my heart and hope to die."

Unaffected, Jill shrugged and said, "Well, ok." She took the ring off of a necklace she was wearing and handed to Ross. "Here, I hope you two, and little Jill are very happy together.

* * *

Now that Ross had gotten Rachel's grandmother's ring, he could set his plan in motion. He almost had everything in place; all he needed now was Rachel. As calm as he could, Ross began to dial Rachel's number. "Yeah, um, Rachel, could you come down to the museum with tat bone you kept?" After Rachel asked about his weird request, Ross found himself scrambling for answers. "Umm…because it turns out that the piece you have may be able to tell us what caused the dinosaurs to become extinct. Yeah, amazing I know!" Ross waited for Rachel's response, sure that she wouldn't buy his excuse. "You're coming? Great! I'll see you soon!" Sighing with relief, Ross prepared himself for the big moment.

* * *

In no time, Rachel began wandering through the museum looking for Ross. Unable to find him, Rachel called out, "Ross, are you here?"

From the planetarium, Ross called for Rachel to follow his voice. "I'm in here! I'm helping Kurt set up some equipment. Come in and I will be right with you."

Rachel headed into the planetarium and was shocked to find the room surrounded in lilies, the way Ross described previously. "Oh my gosh… Ross… but, you don't even work in the museum anymore. How did you pull all this off?" Rachel asked in amazement.

"I still have good friends here," Ross explained, "Besides, I couldn't think of anything more perfect, so I kept my original plan." Continuing with his plan, Ross walked to a podium and turned on some music. Wicked Game by Chis Isaak came through the loudspeakers. Ross then put down a blanket and after they sat, he set out two Crangrape juice boxes. Holding one of the juice boxes, Ross began a toast. "Here's to the best night I ever had in my life, the first time and this time." Rachel continued to stare on in speechless wonderment as Ross again went to the podium. In a matter of seconds the stars in the planetarium rearranged to spell out the question, "Will you marry me?"

Confused and a little frightened, Rachel tried to make excuses. "But we haven't dated for like five years, "Rachel started.

"Does that really matter?" Ross asked. "I know I love you. I never stopped loving you. We've been friends for so long, I know that this is right." Without another word, he took out her grandmother's ring and showed it to Rachel.

"My grandmother's ring?" Rachel asked surprised he could be holding such an important object in her life.

"To go with that pin I got you," Ross explained sincerely.

"Pi…pin?" Rachel asked, confused to what Ross was talking about.

"Yeah, the one I bought you for your birthday," Ross explained further, interpreting Rachel's confusion.

"Yeah…hmmm…" was all Rachel could say.

Knowing what was going on, and somewhat upset by it, Ross asked  
bluntly, "You returned it, didn't you?"

"Yes, I'm sorry." Rachel said quickly, trying to explain her actions. "It's just… When I got it, I realized it didn't look that much like my grandmother's after all." Trying to make up for her lack of sensitivity, Rachel added, "But this ring… This is the real thing." Finally completely realizing what she was actually holding in her hands, Rachel questioned, "But Ross, how did you get this?"

Not wanting to explain the story to Rachel (in fear that once she knew she would say no, and simply not wanting to relive the ordeal over again) Ross simply told her that he had connections. Besides, that wasn't what was important right now. "So what do you say, Rach?" Ross asked, hoping for a particular response.

"I say that I would be hard press to say no."

Thrown off slightly by her response, Ross asked unsure, "Does that mean yes?"

"Yes, it does." Rachel answered smiling back on him. Ross and Rachel embraced each other for a long hug and kiss. When their sealed lips parted Ross continued to hold Rachel in his arms as she laid her head on his shoulder. Sighing with comfort Rachel asked Ross; "Does this mean I get to keep the bone?"

Ross chuckled as he continued to hold onto Rachel, gently swaying her body. "Yeah, you can keep the bone," Ross replied.

* * *

The next morning, Ross and Rachel entered Central Perk. The rest of the gang was already there hanging out.

"We're getting married!" Rachel rang, as the group of friends congratulated them.

Without missing a beat, Monica added, "I'm pregnant!" Everyone turned to Monica shocked at what they just heard. Looking directly at Rachel, Monica added, "I told you it would happen!"

"That's why you wanted to have sex? You tricked me!" Chandler said outraged that he was simply a pawn in Monica's twisted obsession with winning.

"So you're really pregnant?" Phoebe asked, unsure if Monica was simply trying to compete with Rachel, or if she was actually telling the truth.

"Yeah, look, I have it right here," Monica said, pulling the test out of her purse. The rest of the gang turned their heads away in disgust.

"Mon, sweetie, are you sure that's sanitary?" Rachel asked, still making a face.

"Of course it's sanitary," Monica explained. "I sterilized this puppy three times before putting it in my purse. I think I'm going to have it encased. Then when the baby is born, I can show them that this was the test used to find out I was pregnant with him or her."

Still in disbelief, Chandler questioned, "We're…we're really having a baby?"

"Yeah, we're really having one," Monica said to her husband gently.

"I think I need to sit down," Chandler said to himself. He suddenly became lightheaded with the news.

Sitting next to him, Monica asked concerned, "You aren't happy?"

Chandler just looked at Monica point blank in the eyes and plainly said, "No," before cracking into a smile. "I'm ecstatic! I think you just made me the happiest man in the whole world." Chandler said as he hugged Monica.

"This is so great!" Joey exclaimed. "Ross and Rachel are getting married; Chandler and Monica are having a baby. A cup of coffee for everyone!"

Gunther went around to everyone at Central Perk and poured them a complementary cup of coffee.

Having clearly served everyone but Ross, Ross asked, "Hey Gunther, could I have a cup too?"

"No, no coffee for you!" Gunther cried before storming off leaving the rest bewildered.


	2. The One With the Wedding Plans

The gang was all sitting around the table in Monica and Chandler's apartment discussing Ross and Rachel's upcoming wedding, when Rachel came out of the bedroom. She just got off the phone with her father, who managed to book The Plaza Hotel for Ross and her wedding, and she was anxious to share the news with the rest of the gang. Then she warned Ross, "Daddy says you owe him big for all the strings he had to pull to make this happen."

Under his breath, Ross said to himself, "Great, one more Green I owe something to."

Ignoring Ross' mumbles, Rachel continued to tell them that the only opening was April 15th.

"What?! That's only three days away!" Monica cried, "I can't plan a wedding in three days."

Phoebe reminded Monica that it was her turn to be maid of honor, which meant that she got the make the decisions, not Monica. Monica began to object, but Phoebe sharply said, "No! It's my job!"

After discussion about the bride's maids, Ross asked Joey to be his best man. However, Joey was worried that his past crush on Rachel would put a strain on the wedding. Rachel tried to convince Joey by telling him that was exactly why he should be Ross' best man. They were both so happy to have him as part of their lives; they wanted to have him be part of their wedding too. Still, Joey was not convinced; and asked Chandler if he wouldn't rather be best man.

"Gee, work my butt off to help plan an entire wedding thrown together in three days, or sit on my butt and do nothing… It IS a hard decision, but I think I'll go with you being the best man," Chandler said mockingly.

Ross was worried, "Joey, don't you want to be my best man?"

Fumbling for words, Joey answered, "Well…it's just…of course I do!"

* * *

Joey was sitting in the chair in his apartment worrying about his duties as best man when Phoebe entered asking Joey if he wanted to help her plan the wedding. When Joey reluctantly agreed, Phoebe knew there was something wrong with her friend. She asked him what was wrong and Joey explained, "It's just that I'm trying really hard to be supportive of Ross and Rachel. I mean, I bought everyone at Central Perk a cup on coffee." 

"YOU did?" Phoebe emphasized.

"Okay, Chandler did, but I said it was on me. The point is; this is just getting so hard!" Joey complained.

Phoebe tried to comfort her friend. "You care so much about your friends' happiness that you are willing to do anything for them. Remember how you would have given up Kathy for Chandler." As she started to think back to those times, she began to recall what _really_ happened, "But then you found out that they kissed behind your back…and then you made Chandler stay in a box…"

"But Rachel's the first one I've ever really had feelings for," Joey interrupted.

"Aww Joe, I hate seeing you like this, I really do. You feel like looking down my top now?" Phoebe asked trying to cheer Joey up.

"Now you're talking!" Joey said perking up.

Changing the subject, Phoebe brought Joey back to the wedding. "What should we plan for first?" Phoebe asked.

Joey suggested food, and then an idea popped into Phoebe's head. A fiesta!

* * *

In the meantime, Monica and Chandler were also discussing Ross and Rachel's wedding in their apartment. 

"I can't believe Phoebe won't let me help with the wedding," Monica sulked.

Trying to cheer his wife up, Chandler suggested, "Well, maybe that's a good thing." At Monica's gasp in surprise, Chandler explained, "Well, all this activity can't be good for the baby."

Still upset with being excluded, but seeing Chandler's point, Monica said, "Still… She could let me help at least a little bit." Chandler reminded her that when she was Rachel's maid of honor, she didn't let Rachel or Phoebe do anything. Monica countered, "I just wanted things done right…" and then she remembered; she had let Rachel help. "Oh, I let her mail out the invitations, and look where that led. And Phoebe… Remember when I left her in charge of cups and Ice at Rachel's surprise party?"

Chandler thought back to the party. "Oh yeah, that was so great, I…" Chandler said to himself before seeing Monica's scowling face. "I hated it," Chandler continued. "What was Phoebe thinking?!" Chandler claimed as he tried to cover his mistake.

As if on cue, Phoebe walked into their apartment. "Hey guys, I just had the greatest idea; the reception should be a fiesta!" she said.

"A what?!" Monica yelled, clearly upset with the idea. Phoebe was out of her mind, a fiesta was obviously unsuitable for a wedding reception.

Trying to calm Monica's nerves, Chandler told Phoebe, "Yeah, now's not a really good time."

"No, no, it will be fun!" Phoebe said, pushing her idea. "We could wear sombreros and have a piñata filled with candy."

Still upset, Monica went into her room and slammed the door, leaving Chandler looking apologetically at Phoebe for his wife's behavior.

* * *

Rachel and Ross too were talking about their impending wedding. "...and then I was thinking for desert crème brûlée." 

For hours Ross had for the most part tuned Rachel out as he calculated the costs in his head. "Rach, I don't know if I can afford all this…"

"Well, we can cross out all your guests; they already think we're married," Rachel reasoned. She was not about to give up on her dream wedding.

As if trying to break the tension, Joey and Phoebe came in. "Joey and I came up with the greatest idea for your reception; we can have a fiesta!" Phoebe chimed.

"We'll have a rootin' tootin' time," Joey added.

"Is it a western now?" Ross asked sarcastically. Phoebe loved the idea, and readily agreed that was what they should do. "Well, it would be cheaper than Rachel's…" Ross considered.

"No! No, Pheebs. We're not doing a fiesta or a western. Ross and I will plan out the reception." Rachel said trying to regain some control.

"Then what DO I get to do?" Phoebe asked.

"You can be in charge of…" Rachel tried to quickly think of something Phoebe couldn't possibly ruin. "Cups and ice!" Rachel said quickly.

"No! No! I'm not doing that again!" Phoebe said upset.

Ross tried to keep the peace. "You…you can be in charge of music."

"Can I sing?" Phoebe asked, perking up.

"Sure." Ross agreed. Rachel was not as confident. "No, this is good," Ross said to Rachel. "She sings and I don't have to pay for the New York Philharmonic."

"What else do I get to do?" Phoebe asked.

"You want more?!" Rachel cried, outraged.

"I wanna do something too!" Joey piped in.

"Fine…You guys can take care of the invitations." Rachel said exasperated. She just wanted Phoebe and Joey to leave at this point, so she and Ross could finite the details of their wedding.

Phoebe and Joey accepted the responsibility and left without further hesitation. But then a thought occurred to Ross. "Just make sure you guys don't take care of them the way Rachel and I took care of Chandler and Monica's!" Ross called to Joey and Phoebe down the hall.


	3. The One You've Been Waiting For

The girls were sitting excited and anticipating the wedding in Monica and Chandler's apartment. Unable to contain herself, Rachel burst out, "I'm getting married today," and the other girls expressed how happy they were for her.

Talking to herself, Phoebe thought about the day. "I'm so excited! Oh, what am I going to wear?"

Rachel looked at her questioningly and dryly told Phoebe that she would wear her bridesmaid's dress.

"My bridesmaid's dress?" Phoebe asked blankly.

Rachel tried to remain calm, but felt anger boiling up deep inside her as she explained that she and Joey were supposed to pick up the bridesmaids dresses the day before for herself and Monica. However, Phoebe was still confused. "We were?" Phoebe asked.

"Phoebe!" Rachel yelled exasperated.

"You mean you forgot!" Monica asked panicking. "I don't have a dress. I have nothing to wear!"

Phoebe didn't understand what the fuss was about. "Oh, calm down," she told Monica. "It's not a total loss. I'm sure Chandler will be very happy."

Monica however was not amused and ordered Phoebe to get Joey and the dresses at that very moment. However, Phoebe retorted, "You're not in charge; you're not the bride."

Rachel darted Phoebe an evil look and said, "Now Phoebe!"

Phoebe got the clue and said, "Okay, _now _I'm going." And as she ran off she could hear Rachel in the distance telling her to hurry.

* * *

Phoebe picked up Joey from across the hall, and the two of them took Phoebe's taxi to get the bridesmaid's dresses. They managed to pick up the dresses without a hitch and even had time to spare. Realizing this, Joey asked, "Can I get a meatball sub?" Phoebe didn't see the harm in making a quick pit stop to pick up the sandwich and dropped Joey off without hesitation. He quickly ran out of the taxi to go to the local pizzeria and came back equally as fast. "Thanks Pheebs," Joey said with his mouth full of his sandwich. 

Phoebe continued to drive when she heard Joey say, "Uh oh." Phoebe glanced over to Joey while still trying to keep an eye on the road. "I got sauce on my tux!" Joey explained.

Remaining calm, Phoebe said, "Well, we'll get it off when we get…" Her voice trailed off. Defeated she said, "Oh no," and Joey looked at her questioningly. "Umm, yeah, I think we're stuck behind a parade."

"A parade? Cool!" Joey exclaimed as we rolled down the window and began to wave to the people watching the parade.

* * *

Meanwhile, Chandler was watching the parade on TV in a room at The Plaza. Monica came into the room and asked Chandler if he'd seen Joey and Phoebe. Monica was beginning to get worried. They should have been back by now. Never looking away from the TV, Chandler told Monica that he hadn't seen them yet, but he was sure that they were fine. Monica looked at the television and asked Chandler what he was watching. 

"Some Gay and Lesbian Pride Parade," Chandler answered finally tearing his eyes away from the set to see Monica give him a weird look. "It's on all the channels!" Chandler defended.

Monica was about to interrupt Chandler's defense when she heard something familiar come from the TV. "And our next float is…a taxi? Oh wait, there's Joey Tribbiani waving. This must be the Days of Our Lives actor's way of coming out of the closet."

Monica stood for a minute dumbstruck. "Oh my god, what are they doing there?"

"I don't know, but at least I'm no longer the gay one," Chandler said amused.

* * *

Later that afternoon, Chandler and Monica were in the lobby anxiously waiting for Joey and Phoebe's arrival. In no time (but too much time for Monica), Joey and Phoebe came running in. Phoebe handed Monica's dress to her. "You guys are just in time," Monica said relieved. 

Interrupting Monica, too amused by what had happened on TV earlier, Chandler added, "By the way Joe, the greater New York area now believes you're gay."

"Why would you say that?" Joey asked thinking Chandler was playing some sick prank.

"Because that parade you were in was about gay and lesbian pride." Chandler answered.

Joey began to panic. "But no one watches that, right?"

"They wouldn't if it weren't on EVERY channel!" Chandler emphasized.

"Oh my god! What am I going to do?" Joey asked upset.

Not allowing Joey to be upset for long, Phoebe was still trying to remedy what had happened in the taxi. "There's no time for that now; Joey got sauce on his tux!"

"What?!" Monica yelled. The system was clearly falling apart. Joey and Phoebe couldn't do anything to save their lives.

Phoebe grabbed Joey's hand and began to run off with him. "Stall" she called back to Monica.

Joey and Phoebe left just in time. Rachel came in moments later asking if Joey and Phoebe had come yet. Monica had neglected to tell her that they had been trapped in the parade, but instead casually mentioned that they had hit some traffic (after all, it wasn't a complete lie). Monica could see the worry on Rachel's face, and didn't wish to make the situation any worse, but she always had trouble lying to her best friend. She also wasn't very good at being put on the spot. "Yeah! See, here's my dress" Monica fumbled as she held the dress up for Rachel to plainly see. "Right here! Everything's fine!" Monica said trying to prove her point a little too strongly.

"Umm, good," Rachel said hesitantly. She knew something was wrong with her friend, but she couldn't quite put her finger on it. Still, she couldn't let it bother her too much. She had much bigger things than Monica's strange behavior to worry about.

* * *

Phoebe led Joey into the hotel's laundry room and tried to clean Joey's tux. As he stripped down into his t-shirt and boxer shorts he couldn't stop dwelling over the news of the parade. "I can't believe that was the Gay & Lesbian Pride Parade. No girl is ever going to date me again." 

"Sure they will," Phoebe consoled. "You're still hot."

Joey broke into a small smile. Yeah, he was hot! Still, he had some doubts about the female population's perception of him. "Thanks Pheebs," he said, "but I don't think that's going to make the girls believe I'm straight."

Phoebe thought about one of Joey's many interviews. "Well, didn't that reporter lady say you had a huge gay fan base? Maybe you can tell people you did it for your fans, but you're still straight."

Joey was beginning to like the way things were turning in his favor. "Hey, yeah, you're right." Joey said relieved. "Thanks Pheebs. That makes me feel much better." With that he gave Phoebe an intimate hug.

Still holding onto Joey, Phoebe said, "Anything to help. And I would date you in a minute. You know…to help prove you're straight and all."

"Really?" Joey asked touched at her loving gesture.

"Yeah," Phoebe said smiling back.

Monica continued to pace in the lobby anticipating Joey and Phoebe's re-arrival when the minister came up announcing it was time to start the wedding. Monica tried to delay saying that the maid of honor and the best man was still missing. Sympathetic, the minister told them that they couldn't wait any longer and that the wedding would just have to proceed without Phoebe and Joey.

"Well, can we not tell the bride and groom then?" Monica asked.

Sarcastically, Chandler reminded Monica, "Because they won't know themselves when they don't walk down the aisle."

* * *

The wedding ceremony began and Ben (the ring bearer) & flower girl walked down the aisle first. Following them were Monica and Chandler. "Do you think Ross knows Joey and Phoebe are missing?" Monica whispered to Chandler without turning her head or breaking a smile. 

"I didn't think it would be possible for him not to know, but given that he's been standing up there with his eyes closed praying the whole time, I would guess he won't find out." Chandler responded. Sure enough, Ross was standing at the altar with his eyes closed and his lips mumbling a prayer to himself.

"What about Rachel?" Monica questioned.

"Let's just pray she's blind." Chandler said.

Monica and Chandler reached the altar and went to their respected sides. The wedding march started and Rachel appeared before the crowd. Rachel's eyes met Ross' and she walked down the aisle keeping her gaze completely on Ross knowing that this was the most perfect moment in her life. Noticing Ross and Rachel's attention were solely on each other; Monica's hopes were held high. Maybe the wedding could proceed without a maid of honor and best man and no one would be the wiser.

* * *

Meanwhile, Phoebe and Joey were in the laundry room still. Joey's tux was finally ready. 

"Good, now we can finally get to the wedding and watch two of our best friends get married." Joey said with relief.

Looking at her watch, Phoebe said, "Oh, but it should have started by now."

Not wanting to disturb the wedding but also wanting to witness their friends blessed union, Joey and Phoebe decided that they would watch the ceremony from the side so that they wouldn't ruin their moment.

* * *

Rachel and Ross were at the altar staring lovingly into each other's eyes. The minister performed the sacred rite. "Friends. Family. We are gathered to celebrate here today the joyous union of Ross and Rachel. May the happiness we share with them today be with them always. Now Rachel, repeat after me. I, Rachel..." Rachel slowly repeated the words the minister spoke never letting her gaze waver from Ross. When the minister finished with Rachel he moved onto Ross. "Now Ross, repeat after me. I Ross…" 

"I Ross…" Ross repeated.

"Take thee Rachel," the minister stated the next line.

"Take thee…Phoebe?" Ross said as something caught his eye.

"What?!" Rachel said outraged. This was not happening. Not only was Ross saying the wrong name at his wedding again, but this time it was Phoebe. He never even dated Phoebe! Was he not allowed to have any females in attendance of his wedding? He couldn't possibly love them all.

"No, look…" Ross said trying to calm Rachel down. He didn't say the wrong name this time because he truly loved someone else. He just couldn't believe the sight set before him. "Isn't that Phoebe kissing…Joey?!" Ross said as he got a clearer look.

Everyone turned to see Joey and Phoebe kissing off to the side. Feeling watched Phoebe broke the kiss. "Hi, umm, did we miss anything important?" she asked.

Slightly perturbed Rachel responded. "Well, we were kinda in the middle of giving our vows." "But continue," she added sarcastically. Joey was about to take the words to heart when Rachel immediately took it back.

The minister didn't know what to make of the disturbance but was eager to get back on track. "Now, if there will be no more interruptions, we'll continue," the minister said. He continued to perform the ceremony as Ross recited his vows without any further mistakes. When the minister asked for the rings Ben handed them to him and Ross and Rachel placed the rings on each others fingers. Finally, the minister spoke the words that Ross waited for his entire life. "You may kiss the bride." Ross took Rachel in his arms as they shared a romantic kiss. When the receding march began, Ross immediately broke the kiss and Ross and Rachel joyfully ran out the door together.

* * *

At the reception, the wedding guests were looking at Joey as he stood to make a toast. "We are gathered here today on this joyous occasion to celebrate the special love that Ross and Rachel share. It is a love based on giving and receiving. As well as having and sharing. And the love that they give and have is shared and received. And through this having and giving and sharing and receiving. We too can share and love and have and receive…" 

Chandler couldn't believe he was enduring this speech again. He stood up and whispered something in Joey's ear. "Ok, um scratch that," Joey began. "Ross, Rachel, we have been by your side through thick and thin. And it's good to see you two are finally together after all that has happened. And I can only hope that my current relationship," he said looking at Phoebe, "will be smoother than the one you two have shared." The comment received a nasty look from Ross and Rachel. Joey quickly rebounded, "But also comes with the love you two have." Forgiving Joey's earlier comment they smiled at him and then each other. "And now I believe Phoebe has a song for the couple's first dance as man and wife."

"I'm afraid," Rachel whispered to Ross, expecting Phoebe to sing "Smelly Cat" or one of her other weird songs.

"So am I," Ross whispered back.

Not able to avoid dancing any longer, Ross and Rachel stepped out onto the dance floor and Phoebe sang, "And I Love You So."

"Did you know Phoebe could sing like this?" Rachel asked Ross.

"No, it surprised me too." Ross said smiling at his new bride.

Phoebe continued to sing for her best friends. In the middle of the dance, Rachel started to whisper to Ross again, "Umm, Ross?" she asked slightly panicked.

Ross however didn't notice the urgency in her voice. "Yeah?" he asked dreamily.

"I think the baby's coming…" Rachel said seriously.

* * *

Author's Note: Imagine What If: First I gotta say, you're really perceptive. Usually people don't pick up on my little foreshadowing (or maybe they just don't say anything). Secondly, you were right about the invitations and the three days thing. I never thought of that. But for arguments sake, Phoebe isn't that bright, so maybe Ross and Rachel were just giving her something to do. And in this case, well, I know you'd never clean a tux in the regular wash, but I needed to get them somewhere and a reason for it, so tux in the wash it was. 


	4. The One Where It's Time

Ross was floating on air, and the urgency of Rachel's words had yet to hit him. "That's nice," he sighed. As Rachel's words sunk in he became more alert. "What did you say?" he asked.

"I think the baby's coming." Rachel said again seriously.

"We have to get to the hospital!" Ross cried, grabbing Rachel's hand.

Their abrupt movements caught Dr. Green's eye, and just before Ross and Rachel reached the exit door Dr. Green stopped them. "Where do you think you two are going? You can't leave in the middle of the reception," he told them.

"Rachel's having contractions," Ross explained.

Breathing a sigh of relief, Dr. Green said, "Thank God, you two were married just in time." Impatiently, Rachel agreed with her father trying to get around him. Dr. Green failed to see the hurry. "Why? It's your first child," Dr. Green reasoned, "It'll be hours before it arrives."

"You're not helping!" Rachel yelled at her father. All the eyes in the room turned on her. The rest of the gang and Ross & Rachel's family came up to them concerned with Rachel's sudden outburst.

"Rachel dear, you're creating a scene." Rachel's mom said. "Why are you yelling?" Rachel impatiently explained that the baby was coming and her father wouldn't let her leave. "The baby's coming now?" Rachel's mother asked astonished. "We need to get you to the hospital."

"Believe me, I'm trying." Rachel said frustrated.

Loving being the bearer of bad news (misery loves company after all), Chandler told everyone the latest news. "I don't think you're going to be able to. I just saw on the news that after the parade the gay people decided to start a rally, and we're in the middle of it. The whole place is surrounded."

"What were you doing watching the news in the middle of the reception?!" Ross asked upset.

"Let's face it Ross, your reception is lame," Phoebe said bluntly. "Now if you would have gone along with my fiesta idea…"

"Now is not the time Phoebe!" Rachel yelled cutting Phoebe off.

"She gets cranky when she's in labor," Phoebe said rather surprised at Rachel's outburst.

Trying to keep the eye on the prize and get everyone back in order, Monica steered everyone back on track. "How are we gonna get out of here?" she asked seriously.

"What do they want?" Rachel asked Chandler.

Chandler tried to recall what he had heard on the news. "Something about representation in the media." As he said it, they all turned and looked at Joey.

"Wha…Wait a minute! No! No way!" Joey exclaimed panicked and knowing what everyone was expecting of him.

"Why not? They already think you're gay," Chandler reasoned.

"But…" Joey trailed off and looked at Rachel who looked back at him pleadingly. "Yeah, I'll do it." He left the room sulking and came back moments later. "Ok, I did it. They should be cleared out in an hour or so."

"An hour! I can't wait an hour!" Rachel cried in a panic.

"Dear, the guests can still hear you," Rachel's mother said hushed.

Whispering to Phoebe, "You were right, she does get crabby," Mrs. Gellar added.

* * *

Joey and Phoebe sat alone in the waiting room of the hospital, waiting to hear the news of their friends. Joey remained pouting over the events earlier that day. Phoebe couldn't stand to see her friend so upset. "Now you're all depressed again," Phoebe said sympathetically."

"I can't help it, nothing's going the way it should. First I lose my first love, and normally I'd fix that by going out and sleeping with tons of women, but if there was anyone left in the world that believed I was straight after the parade, they don't anymore."

"Well, I know you're not gay. And it was a really sweet thing what you did for Rachel," Phoebe said comfortingly.

"Thanks," said Joey. They sat there few a few minutes in awkward silence. "That kiss earlier…was it just because I was down?" Joey asked breaking the ice.

"Yeah, of course, I mean you're my friend. I wouldn't want to complicate that or anything."

"Oh," Joey said somewhat disappointed.

"Did you want it to mean something?" Phoebe asked.

"No...it's just, it was really good." Joey told her and Phoebe agreed that she was thinking the same thing. "So you know…we could just kiss," Joey said hopefully.

"Yeah, we could do that," Phoebe said hesitantly.

Again, they sat in awkward silence for a few minutes. Joey then decided to bring up that Chandler & Monica and Ross & Rachel's relationship didn't seem to complicate their friendship. "Are you saying you want something more?" Phoebe asked Joey.

"No!" Joey said abruptly. "Unless you do," he added. Phoebe looked at him uncertainly. "I'm just saying, you know, since no girl will ever date me again since apparently I'm gay..."

"So you want me as sort of a backup," Phoebe concluded.

"Yeah..." Joey trailed off, unsure on how Phoebe would react.

Phoebe thought about it for a minute. "Oh why not? I already am. I can date you until you find someone better," Phoebe said nonchalantly.

Joey and Phoebe sealed their new relationship with a hug (of course that's not how Joey wanted to seal it) and went to go check on Rachel.

* * *

Everyone waited to Rachel in her room as she was clearly in pain. "Is it time to start pushing yet?" Rachel asked complaining.

"I'm afraid it's still going to be a while. It's just Braxton Hicks contractions. You can get dressed and go home," the doctor told her.

"You kidding me? Braxton Hicks contractions again?!" Rachel cried upset. "But it hurt so much!"

"I knew you wouldn't be able to handle it," Phoebe said snidely. Rachel stared at her aghast. How could Phoebe make such an assumption? "If you think that was painful, just wait till the real thing," Phoebe explained.

"Phoebe, you're…" Rachel started and then let out a loud scream of pain. "Right," Rachel added breathlessly.

The doctor looked at Rachel again. "It looks like I was wrong. Congratulations Rachel, you're water broke. It shouldn't be long now."

"You were wrong?!" Rachel snapped. "What kind of quack doctor are you?!"

Seeing the doctor was upset by Rachel's remark, Ross interjected, "Honey, seeing that our baby's life is in this man's hands, it's probably not a good idea to make him mad."

Now that Rachel was on her way to giving birth, the doctor cleared the room of everyone but Ross as they all wished Rachel luck.

After Rachel gave birth, the gang came into see her holding her baby girl.

Rachel gazed down at her beautiful baby. "We still need a name for this little darling," she told Ross.

"Umm...about that...what do you think about Jill?" Ross asked hopefully.

Rachel made a face. "Ugh, Jill? Why would we name this little angel after my sister?"

"Because I sorta promised her," Ross said hoping Rachel wouldn't be too upset.

"You what?!" Rachel said in a hushed tone as not to startle the infant, but to let Ross know that she was clearly upset.

"Did you cross your heart?" Phoebe asked trying to find a loophole.

Ross rolled his eyes. "Yes."

"Well then you have to name the baby Jill, or Ross'll die!" Phoebe said panicked.

"I had to trade the baby's name to get your grandmother's ring," Ross tried to explain to Rachel.

"Oh, it's like Rumpelstilskin, except he didn't trade the baby!" Phoebe said brightly.

" So it's like Rumpelstilskin, only not," added Chandler sarcastically.

"Yeah!" Phoebe agreed, not catching Chandler's drift.

"Well, I don't think Jill wants you to guess her name since she wants the baby to have her name," Chandler said stuck on the Rumpelstilskin debate.

"There is no way that I'm going to name my baby Jill," Rachel said firmly.

"I guess we'll just have to give the ring back," Ross said, figuring it was the only way out of the deal.

"No! I love this ring!" Rachel said clutching her hand over her ring finger.

"Well then, I guess her name is Jill," Ross said reasonably.

"No! I love this baby!" Rachel said looking at her newborn child.

Frustrated, Ross asked, "Well then what are we gonna do?"

Being the voice of reason, Monica gave her input. "Why don't you just name the baby Jill and call her something else? Like by her middle name or something?"

Ross thought about the concept. "That could work," he agreed, "Rachel?" he asked.

"Yeah..." Rachel gave in. "I can't believe I'm letting my little sister win," she added upset. But they were still missing a name. "So what should her middle name be?" she asked.

"How about Julia?" Ross asked. He always liked that name. He remembered that was the name he hoped Ben would have if he had been born a girl.

"Sounds too much like Julie," Rachel said remembering the first girl she had to fight for Ross' attention.

"Emma?" Ross asked.

"Do you not remember Emily?!" Rachel said upset.

"Karen?" Ross tried.

"Carol, ex-wife number one!" Rachel couldn't believe how Ross could only manage to pull up names similar to his past relationships.

"Or ex-wife number three, and current wife's middle name," Ross reasoned.

"Oh yeah, Karen..." Rachel thought. "Karen could be good. Jill Karen Geller. It does sort of have a ring to it."

"So we've finally come up with a name?" Ross asked hopefully.

"Yeah..." Rachel agreed. Speaking to her baby she whispered, "Welcome to the world Karen."

* * *

Ross & Rachel's families came in to visit the new baby. "Everyone, I'd like you to meet our little girl, Karen," Rachel said proudly.

"Karen? Ross you promised you would name her after me! I want my ring back!" Jill said upset.

Rachel gave Jill a stern look. "We did name her after you. Her full name is Jill Karen Gellar."

"I just said I would name the baby Jill. I never said that's what we would call her," Ross said tauntingly.

Jill pouted, "Daddy!"

Dr. Green reluctantly sided with Ross. "I'm afraid if that's all he promised, he's right."

Taken aback by his new father-in-law, Ross thanked Dr. Green calling him dad.

"It's still Dr. Green to you!" Dr. Green said sternly. He wasn't about to let his son-in-law think that he had gone soft.

"Hey! Hey! The baby doesn't need to come into a world a yelling," Phoebe mediated.

"Why don't we all just be glad that Karen is finally here?" Rachel said bringing the attention back to the baby.

"Yeah," everyone agreed sighing and cooing at the new arrival.

* * *

A/N: And that's the end of the "series." I did sort of continue it with another story/series. I went back to the name Emma (as to not confuse people). And I think I may have made some other slight storyline changes. But it was meant to follow this story. Let me know if I should post it anyway (if you don't mind an unfinished project, and who knows, maybe one day I'll be motivated to continue). 


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